I Had Relationship Exhaustion...

No matter how good this looks, and yes my girl friend is hott, terrible communication kills any intimacy.

BRIANNE WANTED ME TO FAIL IN OUR RELATIONSHIP....
Sit and think about the domino effect that could have on my life and hers? 

CHALLENGE:
Don’t read ahead….just think for like 30 seconds.  See how much you think you know (instead of reading and nodding “yep I knew that").  Drives me nuts when people pretend to know what you’re saying simply because it makes sense — which is not the same thing as it being present and ACTIVE information in your mindset.  

I clearly have some insecurities and I’m happy to let you see all of them. : )


THE EFFECT IT HAD ON ME WAS HUGE:

1. Exhausted trying to appease someone, who couldn’t be appeased.
2. Started to become a competition for me and a challenge to prove her wrong — not healthy.
3. Started to not feel love and started to love less.
4. Started to work more to feel successful (which broke a boundary for me).
5. Eventually started thinking about other women more.
6. Started playing Golf a lot more.
7. Sex went from great, to good to robotic (gross).
8. Started panicking that I wasted another 2 years in another relationship.
9. Started thinking Love is not a real thing.

IS THIS SOUNDING FAMILIAR???

I totally was ready to throw in the towel.  Maybe I just need to accept it because...

1.This is just the way it goes.
2. I'll just live alone and date. 
3. whatever you can think of...

WHAT DID WE LEARN?:

It's not all about me, there are plenty of things I’ve had to work on to make our relationship better, but I’m keeping this tight — next post we can get into that.  SO WHAT DID WE LEARN...

1. Brianne and I were not being honest with ourselves, which meant we couldn’t be honest with each other.

2.  We had created THREE REALITIES: MINE, HERS AND THE ONE TOGETHER.  You might believe there are things you just don't tell each other...FOR US THAT DOESN'T WORK.

3. Relationships are work in my opinion.  And they’re incredibly rewarding.  When you do the work you will have PERIODS OF effortless kind love.

4.  It’s kind of like practicing a sport.  The game is fun and you play well when you practice hard.

Thanks for reading.  Keep going for more?

OPTIONAL CHALLENGE FOR GROWTH:
​
I challenge you, before reading any of this (BELOW), to write down what “relationship,” means to you.  Journal about it.  Open ended.  Then read below some information I’ve given you to consider.

WHY DO I FEEL SO STRONGLY ABOUT THIS?
It is my belief, as an individual, a coach and a guide that I challenge you to find a place inside your mind that is untouched from any text book, any person and any opinions that are not your own.

BUT HOW?
Practice. Practice explaining what anything truly means to you and ask yourself “WHY,” at least three times.

BUT WHY?
It takes time to find this place inside yourself.  It takes hours of isolation and practice.

THE VALUE?

1. You’ll develop a confidence in your approach to life and happiness that can’t be hijacked.
2. Less Indecisive with anything
3. You’ll find your true self and shed “after-market” version that’s been built.
4. True passion is much easier to find this way.
5. Distractions become more noticeable.

An Indian Philosopher Jiddu Krishnamurti talks about relationships as being one with another.  There are no secrets, or walls between you.  Communication flows in way where the reality of the relationship is the reality of both individuals.

IS THIS REALLY POSSIBLE THOUGH?

Thats for you to decide.

BREATHE WELL,

COACH ERIC